Parent jokes
What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?
They go to infinity and beyond.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite word to say to parents and tabloids? "Leave me alone."
Guys, this is so wrong. I'm an orphan and this extremely offends me. I'm telling my parents, um.......
Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.
Why can't orphans watch PG movies? Parental guidance.
A boy went to a genie and said, "I want to be like Batman."
He went home, his parents weren't there.
Why do orphans only have 360 days?
Because they don't have Mother's and Father's days.
I learned my dad got into a car crash this morning.
And my driver's license got revoked too.
Even if orphans fail their exams, I'm sure their parents wouldn't...
Oh wait...
A girl came to my house. She said, "Where are your parents?" I started crying.
Pro tip kids, you CAN hit an orphan because they can't cry to their parents!
What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?
"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"
Why do orphans hate health ed at school?
Their parents can't opt them out of it.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck a plunger down the toilet.
A boy is about to be sentenced for killing his parents. He begs the judge to spare his life. The judge asks for one good reason he should be shown any mercy. The boy replies, "I’m an orphan, your honor."
Me: "Cya"
Mom: "Where ya going?"
Me: "The orphanage to make yo mama jokes."
Mum: ...
Why don’t you see gay orphans at a daycare?
They have no one to call "daddy."
I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"
I say, "Your parents."
Q: What type of flowers do orphans hate? A: Mums.
What is an orphan's most hated baseball team? The Padres.