Parent jokes
What is the day parents stopped fearing for their little boys? June 25, dead pedo day.
Guess whose parents didn't survive?
Liv's parents.
Why do orphans that go to their friend's house get this reaction from the friend's mom:
"Go back to your house, it's late." "Finn, wait, can I have your mom's phone number?" "Finn, wait, aren't you an orphan?" "Wait, don't you have a phone, Finn?" "Wait, I forgot, you don't have a phone because nobody wanted to get you a phone or to get you."
I asked a kid why he was so blue.
Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.
But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.
What's a benefit of being an orphan?
No one makes yo mama jokes to you.
I asked a kid at my work where his parents were. He started crying. Man, I don't know what I did. I'll ask another kid at the orphanage.
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
People should build orphanages next to graveyards so at least orphans can see their parents.
What did the parents name their retarded baby? Dimitri
I was walking past an orphan and I said, "Just go home."
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?
"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."
How do you know if an Asian is a failure?
Figure it out, because they'll all tell you their parents said they were a failure from birth.
I was going to make a depressing joke, but my parents already did.
What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?
Sum ting wong.
Why did the orphan become a stripper?
To have someone to call "daddy!"
Why did orphans eat ice cream cones?
Because they can't eat a family pack.
What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?
They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.
A child's parents once lived in Chicago.
I wonder why he's in an orphanage now.