OR jokes

What does the mom (or terrorists, fuck that) say for the (twin) towers to eat?

Open wide, here comes the plane!

A black lady goes inside the drug store on Eight Mile Road in the city of Detroit, Michigan, and asks the pharmacist, "I would like to buy a box of tampons."

And then the black lady is asked by the pharmacist, "Do you want to buy the box of mini pads, or do you want to buy the box of maxi pads?"

And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"

And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"

And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."

What's worse, being loved or hated? 'Cause when you're loved you could be left alone or be betrayed, but when you're hated no one's there to leave you. What do you think?

What do you call a guy at your doorstep with no arms or legs? Matt.

So I went to a church and I asked a friend, "Is the picture on the wall Jesus, and does it have three nails or one nail?" Oh wait, that's not Jesus, he is not doing the T pose that he invited.

This morning, I was having a conversation with my ex-boyfriend about reincarnation. I said to him, "If you could come back in the next life as anything, what would you come back as?" He thought about it for a minute and says, "A tree. That way, everybody can look at me and admire me."

Then he says the same thing to me. I started thinking about it when these two sexy, half-naked studs walked by. One was a jock, the other on his bicycle. I know I said I want to come back as a jockstrap or a bicycle seat, but knowing my luck, I'll come back as a tampon.

What has two arms and two legs but can’t walk or run?

Stephen Hawking.

There is a kid in my school who is exactly like Dahmer, but he doesn't eat ppl. Or does he...?

He's Dahmer's son @domink.

What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?

An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.

Would you rather get a massage from a man or get major surgery from a woman?

Which is redder: a baby or a red car? It depends on how the baby was killed!

What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?

A dead person does not walkie or talkie.

Dark humor is like food:

Not everyone gets it.

Or a kid with cancer, it never gets old.

You're so poor that when you walked into an elevator, you thought it was a mobile home.

I need to go to the tailor, or so it seams.

If you feel sad, or you feel that you are not loved... You're with mushroom pizza.

This is a joke. Laugh now or else.

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie?

He can’t walkie or talkie.

EXPERIMENT SUCCESSFUL 😱😱 Scientists have created an element named Pessomium 😳😳

Characteristics: - Highly reactive only in Bolivia and Panama 😡🤬 - Turns invisible when in Brazil or Uruguay 🥵🤧 - Finished 😹🤕 - 0 protons 0 electrons 0 goals 0 assists 7 debuts 🥶

If Stephen Hawking gets a heart attack, where do you go, the hospital or Curry's PC World?