OH Jokes

I found a place before called an orphanage, but when I was allowed in there were lots of kids, and I said, "Where's your parents? Oh yeah, you're orphans." Gosh, that was one heck of a day!

A guy is at his locker, and a girl comes and says, "Hey, I love you."

He says, "Okay, cool." She then replies and says, "Well, what do you think about our love?" He says, "Count the stars."

Then she says, "Oh, infinity!" and he replies with, "Nope, it's just a waste of time."

Oh my Prince, I've loved you ever since the day we met.

When I was caught in your net of love, sweet love... It's all above...

Awww, Gwen thinks she has a boyfriend! Oh wait, no you don't! She is just some loser ass bitch who could be a ho, you don't know. He was mine, and I want him back!

Does anyone know where I can get that picture that went around the internet of Steven Hawking looking at the stairway to Heaven and saying โ€œOh Fu-kโ€?

Me: Hey, are you going to Sawcon?

Sensei: What is that?

Me: Saw con deez nu...

Sensei: Oh, is it for people with ligma?

Me: Whatโ€™s ligm...

Sensei: ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

Me: no no no no

Sensei: Ligma ba...

A dog was in the vet's waiting room and another dog asked, "What are you here for?"

"Well, my owner was looking under her bed for something while naked and I couldn't resist, so I mounted up and screwed her senseless."

"Oh, so you're here to get neutered?"

"Nah, I'm just getting my nails clipped."

After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.

During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."

Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"

President: Them damn flat faced n**g*rs!!

Man: We have the power of the sun itself!

President: Drop it on them!

Man: You push the button.

President: *sigh* Fine give it to me.

Man: Hands over button

President: Pushes it

Both: YAAA!

President: Bumps into the button pressing it again

Both: Oh, sh*t!

Meanwhile in Japan after the first bomb went off

Japanese man: Ah sh*t here we go again

Cousin: Hey, is that an octopus?

Me: Yes, what, it is just an octopus.

Cousin: Oh yeah, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Octopus touch me!

Me: What, it is just one..... ummmmm dad cousin d[id].

An orphan walks into a bar and the barman says, "What are you doing here? You need parent's permission!"

"Oh no, who will I ask?" the orphan says.

!!๏ธ!!๏ธHOLY FUCKING ๐Ÿ–•๐Ÿ‘ฆ SHIT!!๏ธ!!๏ธ!!๏ธ!!๏ธ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING ๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿ’ž AMONG ๐Ÿ’ฐ US ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1 ๐Ÿ˜ฑ! ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ AMONG ๐Ÿ’‘๐Ÿ‘จโ€โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ‘ฉ US ๐Ÿ‘จ IS THE BEST ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ’ฏ FUCKING ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘€ GAME ๐ŸŽฎ ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ’ฏ RED ๐Ÿ”ด IS SO SUSSSSS ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธ๐Ÿ•ต๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฅ๐ŸŸฅ COME ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™€๏ธ TO MEDBAY AND WATCH ๐Ÿ‘€ ME SCAN ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ WHY ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿค” IS NO โš ๐Ÿšซ ONE 1๏ธโƒฃ FIXING ๐Ÿ‘พ O2 ๐Ÿ…พ ๐Ÿคฌ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿคฌ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿคฌ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿคฌ๐Ÿคฌ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿคฌ๐Ÿคฌ๐Ÿ˜ก OH ๐Ÿ™€ YOUR ๐Ÿ‘‰ CREWMATE? NAME ๐Ÿ“› EVERY ๐Ÿ’ฏ TASK ๐Ÿ“‹ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ”ซ๐Ÿ˜  Where Any sus!โ“ โ“ Where!โ“ โ“ Where! Any sus!โ“ Where! โ“ Any sus!โ“ โ“ Any sus ๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Where!Where!Where! Any sus!Where!Any sus ๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ Where!โ“ Where! โ“ Where!Any susโ“ โ“ Any sus ๐Ÿ’ฆ! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Where! โ“ Where! โ“ Any sus!โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Any sus ๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ! โ“ โ“ Where!โ“ Any sus ๐Ÿ’ฆ! โ“ โ“ Where!โ“ โ“ Where! โ“ Where!Where! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Any sus!โ“ โ“ โ“ Any sus!โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ Where! โ“ Where! Where!Any sus!Where! Where! โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ โ“ I ๐Ÿ‘ฅ think ๐Ÿค” it was purple!๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€It wasnt me I ๐Ÿ‘ was in vents!!!!!!!!!!!!!!๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚