Obesity jokes
What’s something you can say about a fat person, but not about strippers?
Those legs sure hold a lot of weight.
Your mama's so fat, she needed NASA to make her ID card!
I keep hearing "Obesity kills."
My only question is "Why is it taking so long?"
Yo Mama is so fat that Nationwide took nine years to get on her side.
Your mama is so fat that when she jumped, they found water on Mars.
Your mama can't walk up the stairs because she eats too much chips.
Your mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, you missed two episodes.
Yo mama so fat...
...people in Florida start buying flood insurance when they see her waddling toward the ocean.
Yo momma's so fat, her shirt size has more X's than Taylor Swift.
Obese is the N-word for fat people.
Yo mama so fat, she ate McDonald's!
Yo mama so fat when she sits down, she sits next to everyone!
Yeah, Asians have squinty eyes, but that's because they have had the displeasure of seeing so many ugly obese Americans in one place.
Why are people in Japan so thin?
Because it didn't end well the last time a Fat Man was there.
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"
Friend: "Your blood pressure!"
yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it told her "I wanted your weight not your phone number."
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
When you went to McDonald's and sat down, you were so fat, they said, "TBC."
Yo mama so fat the scale said, "I need your weight, not your phone number."