Nut jokes
Deez nutz!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite OTT? Nut-Flix.
What did one squirrel say to the other squirrel?
"Stop staring at my nuts."
My name is Myria, my right nut.
A pecan is motivated because pe-can do anything.
Pistachio can’t, but pe-can.
You pecan do it!
I tried to come up with a funny pun about squirrels, but all my ideas were nuts.
Cashew, see, I'm nuts about you!?
I had fresh coconut the last time I went to Hawaii. It’s a tough nut to crack.
I want an almond-flavored biscuit.
I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!
The peanut gained confidence and finally came out of its shell.
The nut is so solid, it’s peanut brittle.
Can I ask you a question? Nut now!
The cashew called the peanut boring.
The peanut felt very unsalted.
What sandwich spread makes people itch?
Flea-nut butter.
What happens to a nervous nut?
It cracks.
What do you call an angry nut with a mustache?
A pistachio.
What did the mama nut say to her son?
“If I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.”