No one jokes
Teachers: Whenever there’s a school shooting, hide under the desk.
Students: Hiding under desk.
Shooter: Well, no one’s in here!
The ketchup told a joke. No one was laughing, but the egg was cracking up!
Why can't orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy".
Why are you mad because no one wants to adopt me?
When your friend asks why you don't smile, then you look at them and realize no one is there because you have no friends. #my life
When I ask my dad if I got adopted, he said, "Not yet, no one wants you."
Why is Transgender Day of Visibility on April Fool's Day?
Because all trannies are clowns and no one takes them seriously.
Go drop-kick an orphan. No one will know, not like his parents would know.
You are adopted.
No cap. No one loves you.
Bye.
Shower thought: If everyone had schizophrenia, no one would know we had schizophrenia or know what it is!
Your mama is so far that when she told a joke, no one was laughing, but the floor was literally cracking up.
Why can't orphans tell jokes?
They have no one to tell them to, people.
When a woman removes polish with chemicals, no one bats an eye.
But when Hitler removes the Polish with chemicals, everyone loses it...
A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs.
"For the last time, Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!"
The man with glasses frowns.
"Where did all the others go, then?"
Hippity hoppity, you are no one's property.
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call “daddy.”
Knock knock.
Who's there?
No one.
No one who?
No one who?
I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past two years.
But no one would do it.
No one.
Why are priests called father?
I don’t know why.
Because calling them daddy is too suspicious.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."