Worst Jokes Ever
What do most disabled people eat?
Their arm.
What's the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It's a surprise when you find the treasure.
Knock knock.
Boo.
No need to cry, it was only a joke. Yeh, I can't think of anything.
I trained a wolf to meditate, so now she's aware-wolf.
Q: What's the best way to eat a squirrel?
A: Open up its little legs.
When the grass is bloody, You play in the mud...
Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?
To be brutally honest, I think his wife let him die for money, because they could just plug him back in. Surely they have an Android cable about?
How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? Nine.
What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.
Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?
So you can watch the expression on their face.
A blind man is going for a walk. Eventually, he reaches a fish market.
He yells, "Hello ladies!"
"9/11 was just a really intense game of Jenga."
Why is Santa’s sack so big?
Because he only comes once a year.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
I have a fear of speed bumps. But I am slowly getting over it.
Déjà Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".
There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves. The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, "Momma, why is my name Rose?" The mommy cow replies, "Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born." The next calf comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?" The mother replies, "Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born." The third baby comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Daisy?" The momma cow again replieds, "Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head." The final baby walks over and says, "Huh Ruh Buh Duh!" The momma cow says, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"
Did you fall from heaven? Because you really did a damage on your face.