Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between sand and food? Africans have plenty of sand.
What's the difference between a dick and a cannon?
Your dick shots longer.
Guy feels something on his back.
“Oh God, please let that be a rifle.”
“Nope. I’m just real happy to see you.”
Catholic men say eating broccoli is like anal sex.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you probably won’t like it as an adult.
Where did Stephen Hawking spend most of his spare time?...
Currys PC World.
Why did Stephen Hawking's wife leave him? She was sick of buying triple A batteries.
Have you ever eaten a clock before? I heard it’s very time consuming.
Someone handed me a knife the other day and told me that it was very smart.
I made sure it didn't outsmart me.
You're so damn fat that the only belt that fits you is an asteroid belt.
My girlfriend's last words:
"I can’t wait to become a mom!"
Where do dogs go when their tails fall off?
To the retail store.
How do you call a cop?
Through the phone.
(My puns are bad)
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone. Wing-wing Halo?
What do you do with a dead chemist?
You Ni-tro-gen!
Why did the turkey suck my bacon? Because it wanted cum in its mouth.
Once I tried to catch some fog.
I mist.
I'll stop with the horrible puns if you can say a good joke.
Don't scare me! I poop easily!
I didn't fart. My ass likes you so much, it just blew you a kiss!
My diet:
Make all of my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look...