Worst Jokes Ever
I was walking in the forest with my gf.
I had a Desert Eagle for protection.
A bear jumped out of the bushes; one shot was enough to put my gf down, and it gave me enough time to run away.
Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.
What is burned dark and glued to the wall?
A bad electrician.
I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store.
I said to him: "I don't think they have what you're looking for, sir."
Part 1: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.
Part 2: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.
Part 3: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.
Part 4: Guess what... two men were walking down the way when the second one fell in the sewers and died... The first one was lonely.
Beatles
Are cool.
Why did the orphan have an iPhone X? Because it didn't have the home button.
Like if you think rape jokes are funny.
You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.
What did jptheflip win while playing this server?
Craft.
What do you call a banana driving a car?
A banana car.
Haha, dead.
What do you call a cow that eats grass?
A lawn mooer.
What did the toilet paper say to the other toilet paper?
"Hey, check me out! I'm on a roll!" 😂😂🤭🤭
I have a really good construction joke.
But I'm still working on it.
What does a serial killer make for breakfast?
Scrambled legs and toes.
Jim's car is swerving all over the road, so a cop pulls him over. "Step out of the car," says the cop. "I am going to need you to take a breathalyzer test." "I can't," Jim responds. "You see, I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack." "Alright," says the cop, "then you're going to have to take a blood test." "Can't do that either," Jim responds. "I am a hemophiliac, if a wound is opened, I won't stop bleeding, and I could bleed to death." "Ok," the cop answers, "then I will need a urine sample." "Sorry," says Jim, "I also have diabetes, that could push my sugar count really low." "Fine, so just come on out, and walk a straight line for me." "Can't do that either," responds Jim. "Why not?" demanded the exasperated cop. "Well, because I'm drunk!"
Where is the pocket?
It is there, the pocket.
Why did the egg fall off the motorbike?
He was shite.
What do you call butter without an expiration date?
A miracle butter, because wow!