Worst Jokes Ever
The police told everyone to put their hands up, and the police were having fun waving their hands around.
What do you call a man who can fly? A flying man.
Little Johnny and his dad were going to buy a horse.
Dad: Rubbing on the horse’s chest and butt.
Little Johnny: What are you doing?
Dad: Checking to see if the horse is healthy so I can buy it.
Little Johnny: Oh well, I think the mall man wants to buy mom.
What is a doe called with no legs?
•" No legged deer."
What do you call a deer with no ears?
•" No eared deer."
What do you call a deer with no eye?
•" No eye deer."
XDDDDDD
A father awaits the birth of his first child.
The obstetrician says, "Unfortunately, he has no arms."
The father says, "I'll love it all the same."
But the obstetrician adds, "It is also without legs, trunk, head."
The father says, "I'll love it all the same."
Then the obstetrician confessed to him, "I'm sorry, but only this ear was born."
The father says, "I'll love it all the same."
And the obstetrician says, "Talk to him closer: he's deaf!"
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?
A war of nutrition.
What is red and looks like a zebra?
My arm. Hehhehehehe UwU
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, "WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!" A man in the back responds, "YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!"
Dad and Mom: -takes one look at Child-
Dad and Mom: "We don't want him."
Orphan: And I took that, personally.
Why can’t orphans work at SC Johnson’s?
Because it’s a family company.
Hey, what is the difference between a painting and a wife?
Only the wife was hung up.
What does the penis say to the condom? "Cover me I'm going inside."
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
What does a cannibal call people in water?
Sea food.
How do you get your grass to cut itself?
Make it depressed.
A robber held up a depressed kid at gun point.
The depressed kid took the gun, and said, "I'll do it myself."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home. 😀😀
Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."
What do you say to a girl with no arms and no legs? Nice boobs!