Who wants to be my boyfriend, please?
Worst Jokes Ever
What did the tomato say to the other tomato?
If you take off the first and last letter of "demon," they're gonna turn emo.
Why does Elmo turn emo? Because he's Elmo emo.
What do you call a ball with no hair? A Mexican ball.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on a bungy jump?
Spasticelastic.
What do you call Stephen Hawking in a burning building?
Hot Wheels.
What is an orphan's hated movie line?
E.T. phone home.
What’s the difference between a dad and a boulder?
About 15 stone.
What’s the difference between a robber and an orphan?
One is wanted.
Man, that's funny!
I know your hairline's pretty bent, but your gender's on a different level.
Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.
Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.
Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.
What's the difference between Wacko Jacko and Elvis Presley?
14 number 1 hits.
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?
He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
Ariana Grande agrees with me on something: women belong in the kitchen and bedroom.
Women should be allowed to choose: dishes or cooking first.
Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.
Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?
His family was blown up by meteors.
"My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104."
