Worst Jokes Ever

Is it just me or is your personality fake as well? Can't tell because everything about you is.

What kind of car does an Indian person drive? A Pri-yas.

Yo mama is so black that she has her own solar system.

Yo mama is so Jewish that pennies run away from getting pinched by her.

Yo mama is so ugly that even scammers wouldn't go after her money.

Yo mama is so fat that she crushed her PlayStation profile.

You're so boring that you make war veterans die quicker, and yet they're still on life support.

When they said sin was ugly to look at, I didn't know God would use you as an example.

What's one way to drain someone's ego?

Hand them a mirror, and say they should see how ugly they turned out in life.

What makes my life so unfair?

You invading it for no apparent reason.

You're so dark that even God's light can't shine upon you.

Q. What do you call a prostitute who asks too many questions?

A. An intrusive thot.

When the police caught him stealing batteries, he was immediately charged.

The cops are accusing him of resisting. He's now languishing in a cell, where he is currently awaiting an appearance in Circuit Court.

How many bisexuals does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends, are you AC or DC? However many turn you on.

How many Lawrence Welk fans does it take to change a light bulb?

"A one, and ah two."

I donated blood today. In the future, I will try to remember that I'm supposed to donate my blood only.

Why is there a big old gay parade on one of the first days of summer?

Pride always cometh before the fall.

Ever since convicted New York State felon Donald John Trump has taken office, the Canada-US border has been a mess of tariffs, counter-tariffs and boycotts.

And where does it end? I just got served a salad with 500 Islands in the dressing instead of a thousand. The price was the same.

What's the worst thing to hear in a prison shower?

"Drop the soap, we've got you surrounded."

"Sir, we noticed a 2-year gap in your resume."

"That was when I went to Yale."

"A Yale man? Well, you're hired!"

"Thanks! I really need this yob!"