Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Morbid jokes

What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?

They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.

Morbid jokes

What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?

One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.

Candy

There are some questionable candies out there, such as:

"All I want is a good Blow Pop."

"I don’t even want to know where that Butterfinger has been."

"If you do, you’ll probably end up with tasting the rainbow."

"Nobody wants to bite into an O’Henry."

"Or adopt Three Musketeers."

"Or even end up with a Sour Patch."

what do blind people and orphans have in conman? they both cant see they're parents...

Woman

When a woman says, "I need to be treated like a delicate flower," don't cut the wrong cord on the bomb.

Woman

How do you know that a woman is about to say something smart?

She starts the sentence with ‘a man once said.’

Did anyone around here lose a roll of twenty-dollar bills wrapped with a rubber band? Because we found the rubber band.

What's the difference between a broken shovel and a young child?

The shovel doesn't cry when you swing it into a wall repeatedly.

Cat

An innocent boy is reading through his father’s phone, looking at the messages and trying to learn things about his family from them. He saw a message asking for something which seemed strange, but ultimately the boy decided to surprise his father with what it said.

“Timmy, why are there thirty-five cats in the living room?” shouted the father.

“I was only supplying what you wanted from Mother!” replied the boy.

Peter Griffin

Peter Griffin walks into a bar.

Peter Griffin walks into a bar.

Peter Griffin walks into a bar.

I think I may have forgotten the rest of the joke.

Twin Towers

What did the World Trade Center order from Domino's Pizza?

They ordered two large planes.