New Jokes - Page 2 - Worst Jokes Ever

This bitch got mad at me because I couldn’t last four strokes. My grandpa didn’t even survive one.

If a Jewish kid has ADHD, do they get sent to a concentration camp?

Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.

Why do you wrap a hamster in duct tape?

So it doesn’t explode when you’re fucking it.

What do you say to a woman in a wheelchair with no arms or legs Nice tits

Water was found on Mars.

Mars: 1 Africa: 0

How do you know if a Black woman is pregnant?

Stick a chicken wing up there.

Why do cheetahs run? Because they are spotty.

Unless Israel wants to become Hell Aviv, it would put itself on a tight leash, delivered specially from Uncle Sam.

I actually want peace, not war.

That's what I always try reminding my girlfriend before beating her up.

Make Danielle Smith a lot lizard again!

My grandad and your hairline go way back.

You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.

You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.

You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.

I hope you're an organ donor so your organs can go to someone who deserves them.

Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?

To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.

In Rocket League, you don't care who wins game MVP as long as it's not somebody on the other team.

I like my women like I like my scotch:

12 years old and mixed with coke.

Mom clean your room Me no it’s my room and I don’t want to clean it Mom you are nothing like Mrs. Smith’s daughter me Well I’m not Mrs. Smith’s daughter now am I you are the Worst like why are you trying to compare me with Mrs. Smith’s daughter I’m not her OK I am not her so stop Mom do you know what I pushed you out of my hula 43 minutes do not make me hate you because guess what I brought you into the world and I can take you out of it Me bro