Worst Jokes Ever
I thought Gastown was in Vancouver, not in Wilkie, Saskatchewan.
Tracy Latimer was described as cheerful, popular at school, and as an animal lover.
Just trying to gas her up a little bit.
Who is Tracy Latimer's least favourite Beauty and the Beast character?
GASton.
I read a book on the Tracy Latimer case the other day.
It was a gas.
There are so many things about Tracy Latimer's murder that I wish I knew. Did he buckle up her seatbelt? Did he put the radio on for her?
Did he tell her she was going on a little trip to Gastown?
Who is Tracy Latimer's least favourite actor?
Vin Diesel.
What's the difference between Trump and a Cheez-It cracker?
The cracker is naturally orange.
What do autistic kids and birds have in common?
They both flap their arms.
Got my girlfriend a "get better soon" card. She's not sick, I just think she can do better.
If number 666 is evil, then 25.8069758011 is the root of all evil.
Why is it called scissoring and not lip-syncing?
Alberta.
The only province where the Premier wears anal beads around her neck.
What is the national bird of Iran?
An American drone.
Can I get a building license?
It's the end of the world!
Ok, so let me tell y'all the lore. Basically, what happened was there's these mfs called Rhys and a guy named Mobrur. Mobrur is a fish basically from Bangladesh and Israel, so he's just a fish because he's Netanyahu's cousin, and Liam is from Australia; he's just a white piece of crap.
Basically, what happened was they knocked up each other because they were drunk and jumping on Netanyahu's beer belly, and it was all just a mess. Rhys is trying to get child support and half property from Fish, but he won't give it because he is nasty and claiming what isn't his, and he said, "No one likes you." So to summarize it, he killed him and is in jail now.
And there he met Mooha and he turned straight, Alhamdulillah! EVERYONE SAY ALHAMDULILLAH! He became straight, then Mooha got knocked up in prison and the guards beat them and they died.
What do you call a series of ascending steps with eyes that follow you intently?
A starecase.
Are you the king of the jungle? 'Cause why are we lying?
Why did the child throw the butter out of the window?
So she could see a butterfly.
Why is a football stadium always so cold?
Answer: Because it has a lot of fans!
What do you call an ant who fights crime?
A vigilANTe!