Worst Jokes Ever
Why are liberals so bad at playing hockey? Because it is played on ICE
Why cant Americans play chess?
Because they lost their towers...
What did Britney Spears’s left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they’ve never met
Tork Poettschke & Jack London walk down the street together. One asks the other, "May I stand in the middle?"
Charlie Chaplin and Tork Poettschke meet.
Chaplin: "What can I do for you?"
Poettschke: "Please get away from me."
Bertold Brecht & Tork Poettschke visit the places of their youth together. One says to the other: "Here used to be the Phoenix Lake. Where did he go?" "That was probably a pirate ..."
Tork Poettschke says to Charles Bukowski: "You have beautiful teeth! Are they also available in white?"
I keep hearing "Obesity kills."
My only question is "Why is it taking so long?"
“Which tool,” Andrea Bocelli asks Chris Doemges, “fits best in the mailbox?”
Doemges: “Probably the flathead screwdriver!”
Joe Rogan to Christopher Doemges: "What can you tell me about musicians of the 18th century?" Doemges: "They're all dead already!"
Beethoven to Chris Doemges: "What instrument do you play outside in the Arctic at -12 degrees Celsius?"
Doemges: "Probably the shiver..."
Who do the United States owe trillions of dollars to?
Jew-piter.
Why can't Asians golf?
Because they can't drive.
What do you call a retarded Mexican?
Ricardo.
What do you call a disabled person that has no legs and likes being alone?
Leaving, walking.
The man had no arms and a little girl came over and said, "Give me a high-five."
He said, "I’ve got no arms," and the girl said, "Are you an eel? Cause he don’t have arms."
Is a disabled person who has no arms but has guns armed or not armed?
My nephew hated working outside in landscaping, so I got him a job in the twin towers; I don't know why he keeps complaining about it being an inside job.
What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your boots off before jumping on a trampoline.
When do we think the Empire State Building is going to be shot down?