Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Christmas

What is it you can give at Christmas and still keep? Herpes.

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  • Mexican

    Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? Because they'll steal all the green cards.

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  • Lesbian

    My lesbian friends bought me a gold timepiece for my birthday.

    But, I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch!"

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  • Difference

    What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?

    Your job still sucks!

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  • Marriage

    Why is divorce so expensive?

    Because it's worth it.

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  • Marriage

    Q: Why is marriage not a word?

    It's a life sentence!

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  • Russian

    Q: What's the difference between a smart Russian and a unicorn?

    A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters.

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  • Iraq

    What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad?

    You shout out, "B-52!"

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  • Iraq

    What do you call an Iraqi who owns a camel and a goat?

    Bisexual.

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  • Lesbian

    Why is it called scissoring and not lip-syncing?

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  • Twin Towers

    Why was 10 scared?

    Because it’s between 9/11.

    Viagra

    We found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra. No one is taking it harder than my dad.

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  • Orphan

    Why do orphans love a room of mirrors?\n\nBecause they're surrounded by loved ones!

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  • Woman

    What’s one thing that comes up at the worst possible time and ruins your day?

    A period.

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  • Difference

    What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?

    One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.

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  • Difference

    What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?

    One reads, the other breeds.

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  • Difference

    What's the difference between a nun and a hooker?

    One is glowing and the other is blowing.

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  • Difference

    What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?

    One to trust and the other to thrust.

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  • Difference

    What’s the difference between a nun and a hooker?

    One kneels for salvation.

    The other kneels with salivation.

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  • Adult

    Why won't an American atheist convert to the religion of Islam in the city of Dearborn, Michigan?

    Because being on the sex offender list is the only requirement to be able to join a mosque in the city of Dearborn, Michigan.

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