Music jokes
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap?
"There's a great singer inside of you."
Who is the man behind all lives matter?
Michael Jackson.
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
Roses are red, violets are blue, when The Oh Hellos saw you they said "Shoo!"
Why was the dog stealing shingles?
He wanted to be a woofer.
The first thing the emo did at the party is to pin the gun to their head.
What’s the similarity between peas from Tesco and emos?
They both have barcodes.
Beethoven composed his whole life.
What did he do in the afterlife? He decomposed! Har har har har har har.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite button?
Light mode.
What's the last thing that went through Curt Cobain's mind?
His teeth.
Kris
Damn this shit!
Megan Thee Stallion: What!
Kris: My mother is a fucker!
The whole world:
OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why did the rapper bring a comb to the concert?
Because he wanted to STYLE his FLOW.
How do you make someone in Africa disappointed?
Sing "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head."
Employer: Can you perform under pressure?
Me: No, but I do a pretty good "Bohemian Rhapsody."
Who gets more dick, straight male rap fans or straight male swifties? Answer: Straight male rap fans, because there’s no such thing as a straight male swiftie.
What did Michael Jackson say when he became a triangle? Tetraheehee!
Somebody told me to type "Up" by Cardi B. So here it goes:
Up
Stephen Hawking always wins musical chairs, as he’s always sitting down.
What's an emo black kid called? A dark Drakie.
What is a Mexican’s favorite band?
Twenty Juan Pilots.