Five little monkeys jumping on the bed,
One fell off and bumped his head.
The momma called the doctor and the doctor said...
“We’re calling Child Protective Services.”
it was just a prank bro.
I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.
Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.
9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.
Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.
Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!
Rape is such an ugly word, I prefer the term "struggle snuggle."
Two priests are pulled over by the police. One priest asks the cop what the reason for pulling them over is. The cop says, "We are looking for two child molesters." The priest look at each other and tell the cop they'll do it.
I was blessed with a 9 inch penis.
The priest is in jail now.
Johnny Depp to a 15-year-old girl: "Wow, look at that sexy body! Savvy!"
Michael Jackson, when talking about a 6-year-old boy: "The boy is mine! That doggone boy is mine! Don't waste your time...."
Donald Trump, Bill Clinton, and Jeffrey Epstein entering and exclaiming, "Wow, this place is more fun than the Playboy Mansion!"
Bill Cosby on rape: "But, I heard, 'my body, my choice.'"
My son was thrown out of school for letting a schoolgirl wank him off.
"That's the third school this year..." I said to my son, "... Maybe teaching isn't for you."
What's the hardest thing about being a pedophile?
Just trying to fit in.
Why do so many people get charged with rape? Because they are too stupid to finish her off and bury the body.
It’s not rape if she’s a dead bear and I lost my job at the circus.
What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
Predator 2.
Why did the zookeeper lose his job? For choking the chicken and spanking the monkey!
Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”
Kid: “Whatever!”
Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”
Kid: “Doesn't matter!”
Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”
Kid: “Oh well!”
Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”
Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Got fired from the bank yesterday.
They caught me drinking on the job.
