ME jokes

Boy: *scares girl*

Girl: "Gosh, you scared me, Jesus!"

Jesus: *Arrives out of nowhere and said, "What is it, human? I got work to do."*

Girl: What work?

Jesus: "Coming out of nowhere when people say 'Jesus.'"

Hey Qwen, it's me.

GBM when he sees Soph (gets a boner) and has sex with Soph but realizes he forgot to put on a condom. Soph: "This is why Arsenal fans are so deluded and retarded."

Normal Fans after they lose the game: Good game, you guys played really well. GBM: "BRO REF WHAT THE BLOODY HELL YOU DELUDED ASS RETARD, OMFG WE LOST BECAUSE OF THIS REF!"

Adapt: Hey Adapt, did you know you're smart? Smart for being retarded. Yo Adapt!! You're so stupid that you gave me your Roblox account info and you said thanks about it!!

Barca fans after the LFC vs Barca game: We bottled it, damn it, we'll win the Copa Del Rey tho. Commie after the LFC vs Barca game: "YOU NEVER WALK ALONEEEEEEEEEE" Normal People: I support only 1 team. Commie: I support Barca, LFC, and AEK!! And I'm the biggest plastic in the server!!

I’m still wearing the smile you gave me last week :)

I find that a lot of butts CRACK me up.

Alex: Dad, can we get me a little brother from the orphanage?

Dad: Sure, Alex! We're here!

Orphanage manager: Alex! You are so big now!

Alex: Dad, what is she talking about?!

Did the sun just come out, or did you just smile at me?

Riddle: I can fill a room, others can have me, but I can't be shared. What am I?

Answer: Loneliness.

Person: Bro, you have a bad and stupid life.

Me: Yeah, it was all good till you were here!

Person: WTF!

So, I was going out the door and I see my dwarf neighbor at the bus stop. I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with "fu.. off." So, I zip up my backpack and keep going to work.

Unknown be like: "Wah wah, I'm too scared to talk to girls in real life, so I bully random tweens I find online to make me feel better... what a shame."

In the morning at 6:30 AM,

Teacher: Who fought in World War I?

Me: Trump & Biden.

Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.

After school,

Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.

"She looks at her clock."

Teacher: And now I am sewed.

Orphan: I finally have a father!

God: And who is that?

Orphan: You!

God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me.

Orphan: :l

Me: I have a dream.

Mom: What?

Me: For you to fucking shut up.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

God made me pretty, what happened to you?

Nobody: The crickets in the back: Talk talk talk.

Me: JOE MAMA OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Gutted rn... the girl I loved hard just got in a relationship. She liked me too so I missed the chance. Idk if she still does... man...

My mom told me a joke she made 13 years ago, but she didn't tell me what it was... Anyways, I'm turning 14 next month.

Guys, add me as a friend in Roblox. I'm hawaiilover973 :D

Gwen, don't worry, everyone hates you, by the way! Have anything to say? Then who cares? You can't stop me.

Unknown person is going to give you a hint of who hates you...we were in a club, a meeting...btw this is you!

[Image of Gwen]

Later, Bitch!!!!!!!!