Match

Match jokes

What happened when the fire used Tinder?

He luckily got a lot of matches.

Alicia was not a popular girl. None of the guys noticed her. Once she got a boyfriend, but then he cheated on her with Katy and said, "You're not sexy enough, Katy is much hotter."

So Alicia took a match, set herself on fire, and screamed, "THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!"

And then she died.

I searched on Google, "How to start a wildfire?"

I got 39,300,000 matches.

You know, eBay sucks. I was looking for a lighter, and it gave me 18,906 matches.

Hey God, what are you making?

Just a wooden stick that lights on fire.

Sounds like a match made in heaven.

  • 2
  • Did you hear the score in the Egypt vs Ethiopia football game? Egypt 8, Ethiopia didn't.

  • 3
  • Little Natalie was playing with matches. Her mother caught her, took them, whupped her, and told her never to play with matches again.

    A few minutes later, Little Natalie was playing with matches again. The curtains caught fire, and the house burned down.

    Another few minutes later, when she and her mother were sitting at their neighbors', her mother told her: "If you think I gave you a whupping, wait till your father gets home!"

    Little Natalie just cackled with delight because she knew her father had gotten home earlier and gone upstairs to take a nap.

    There was a recent football match between Ethiopia and Egypt.

    Egypt 8, Ethiopia 0.