Why did the bee get married?
Because she found her honey.
A teacher asks a boy in her class "If 3 birds are sitting on a fence, and one is shot, how many are left?" The boy responds with "None." The teacher asks why. "They would all fly away after hearing the gunshot." The teacher says, "The answer is 2, but I like the way you think. Later, the boy asks the teacher "3 women walk out of an ice cream shop. One is eating with a spoon, one is licking it, and one is sucking it. Which one is married?" The teacher says "The one sucking it." The boy says "No, the one wearing the ring, but I like the way you think."
Once upon a time, fraternal twins, brother and sisters, with almost 100% equal DNA were separated at birth. At the age of 42, they were married, had 2 sons and 2 daughter. They took an ancestryDNA test, and the results were scientifically sexually shocking.
Why did Ms Grapes 🍇 want to marry Mr Grapes 🍇?
Because she loves raisin kids.
Anjolina Jolie was married to Brad Pitt... Does that make her a "Brad Nailer", and him a "Jolie Jumper"?
When I was walking home, a couple of married guys was saying your mom is good at her job, but I realize my mom doesn't work. So I ask my mom why are these guys saying your good at your job, you don't work. My mom said yeah I got new job. So I said what do you do. My said job hand, no I mean is called a hand job
My wife and I have been married over 30 years. But don’t get me wrong, we still perform tricks in the bedroom. I sit up and beg, she rolls over and plays dead.
What do bees 🐝 do when they get married? They go on a honeymoon.
A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender " what no soap? " then he dies and she marries the barber.
Three nuns up to Mother Teresa and say Mother Teresa we would not like to be eaten anymore Mother Teresa says okay but first you have to do something Unholy so they a leave and come back 3 days later the first one the first one says Mother Teresa I did something Unholy I took a little kids bike Mother Teresa says okay who drink from the holy water and you are free to go II unlocks upset I did it something worse than her I slept with a married man the last nun walks up and says I did something worse than all of them Mother Teresa says oh god oh gosh are there in the third nut and says I peed in the holy water
Why can't melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
Why did Obama marry Michelle?
Because he's into chicks with dicks.
Why do Cantaloupes always get married in the church? Cause they can't elope.
An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girls vagina. Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein and they got married and had children who were all named minion. Eventually the rest of his family died and pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were “I have finally ‘peared’ the consequences of all my actions.”
Why do Indians marry cows, because they bathe in milk.
Why do Indian man marry fat Woman
Why do Indian men marry fat women?
Because they worship cows.
when a lady gets marries what does she borrow? She borrows her husband last name?
*a married woman gets hit by a truck and the cops tell her husband Cop: sir, it looks like your wife’s been hit by a truck Man; I know but she has a great personality
