Mama jokes
Yo mama so fat, Thanos had to snap twice.
Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.
Yo mama so ugly that on Halloween she didn't get candy.
Your mama is so fat, she only knows three words: KFC.
Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.
You mom.
Your mama so ugly, when the baby came out of her, the baby didn't cry. The baby said, "What the hell is this shit?" and walked out of the hospital.
Puerto Rican teen: I'm a waste, a failure, NUNCA LO PODRA ASER (I'll never be able to do it).
The mother: AI NINO (OH CHILD).
The teen: QUE? (WHAT?)
The mother: NO TE PONGA CON ESTA MIELDA OTRAVES! (DON'T START WITH THIS SHIT AGAIN!)
The teen: I CAN'T DO SHIT RIGHT MAMA!
The mother: OOOHHH YEAH WELL TU SI PUEDES ABLAR MIELDA DE TI, I BOTAR BASURA! (YOU SURE CAN TALK CRAP ABOUT YOURSELF AND THROW OUT THE TRASH.)
The teen: QUAL (WHICH).
The mother: MADRE DE DIOS (MOTHER OF GOD).
The teen: AVIA UNA NEGRA I OTRA BLANKA (THERE WAS A BLACK ONE AND WHITE ONE).
*A phone buzzes.*
The teen: Whose phone is that, ma?
Unknown: MR. PRESIDENT IF YOU TAKE AWAY THE CONFEDERATE FLAG HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO THE BAD WHITE PEOPLE ARE?
*Runs to bag, opens white one and sticks hand in.*
The teen: HAIR GEL
Hey, Hunger Games... I'm full!!
This ain't your mama's monologue.
Your mama is so short, she does backflips under her bed.
Yo mama so ugly, she made Kanye West go east.
Yo mama so poor she walked into an elevator and thought it was a mobile home.
Yo mama so stupid, she went to the Super Bowl with a spoon!
Your mama so fat, when Pennywise said, "We all float down here," he saw her and suddenly knew he was mistaken.
Yo mama so fat, She the iceberg.
Yo mama so fat when she wanted to get wet, she used the highway as a slippin' slide!
Your mama is so fat that when she wears yellow, kids run after her thinking they missed the school bus.
Your mama is so stupid, she bought tickets for Xbox Live.
Your mama is so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.
Your mama is so stupid that when she heard drinks were on the house, she grabbed a ladder.