Make jokes

Pro tip: How to not hit your thumb with a hammer, make your child hold the nail.

Do depressed people hate swimming?

They hate it because they are already drowning in their depression, but they love it because it might make all their dreams come true.

To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.

I am not making a noose; I am making an unsubscribe button for life.

Sometimes when I think I'm ugly, I just think of my sister and it makes me feel better.

What flour do orphans use whilst making cakes? Self-raising.

The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.

What do you say after making fun of a disabled person?

"Sorry, I didn't mean to step on your toes."

What makes a joke a dad joke? When it leaves and doesn't come back.

Why can’t an orphan make a joke?

Dad jokes.

I made a website about orphans.

But I can’t make a home page.

How do you make a peanut laugh? You crack it up!

What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?

A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.

What food makes you smart? Salt, because it's a mined food.

If I look after chickens, does that make me a chicken tender?

What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?

They both got a 10% survival rate...

Don't commit suicide, that would make DJUNGELSKOG sad!

I’d make a joke about prostitutes and women sleeping with multiple men, but it would just be whore-ible.

Now it's time to make fun of Asians.

What do you call an Asian eating jelly? Yellow Jell-O.

I was going to make a depressing joke, but my parents already did.