Lot jokes

Why do people have a lot of money and they have to spend it on jewelry 24/7 all the time?

Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

Stacy: lol

What do you call a guy that lies a lot?

The president.

If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.

Your hairline and your forehead must have a lot in common because they go waaaaaaaayyy back!

"I know, you have a lot on your plate right now."

One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"

One would think Dracula would have a lot of friends. Unfortunately, no one likes him. He is a pain in the neck.

You walk into a room, and there’s a lot of people waiting in line to punch you... Yeah, that’s the punchline.

What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?

Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?

My dad owns a countertop store and sometimes he'll barter.

A lot of the time he will take things for granite.

A lot of counter-offers were made.

Am I doing my work? Because typing this took lots of work.

You know, it takes a lot of balls to successfully compete in women’s sports as a man.

My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

Cam likes to peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee a lot.

As you can see here, Jessie is wearing a lot of concealer.

Jessie?

What happened when the fire used Tinder?

He luckily got a lot of matches.

They say that "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach," but I find it a lot easier to go through the ribcage.

A lot of people get mad at me for my bad jokes. I always thought they were punderful.

I watched a movie with a lot of ketchup on the ground.

I don't know why my friends look disgusted.