Loss jokes
What do you call a selfie taken by an orphan?
A family portrait.
Not even the FBI knows where an orphan's parents are.
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
Why do orphans love role-plays?
Because they can call someone "daddy."
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because the dad never came back with the milk.
Why can't orphans have cereal? Because their dad didn't come back with the milk.
Depression: Here, your mom just died.
Me: My mom is already dead.
Why does an orphan start with an "O"?
Because they only see their parents in their dream.
Why don't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
Why can't an orphan have an iPad?
They can't find the home button.
Dads are like boomerangs, I hope.
What's an orphan's favorite toy? A boomerang, because it comes back.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they couldn't run home.
What's the difference between parents and a boomerang?
The boomerang comes back from the store with milk.
Why can't an orphan use an Apple iPad?
Because it can't find the home button...
Why can't an orphan play football? Because they can't find home or return it.
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
Why can't orphans steal bases?
Because they can't find home.
So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.
The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"
The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it has no home button.