Loss jokes
What is an orphan's favorite website? Zillow.
Why does the orphan not buy milk?
That's what their parents are doing.
There is an upside to being an orphan.
Every bag of chips is family size.
Why does an orphan have to go to church? Because that's the only way he can pray for a father.
I saw a little boy begging for money.
I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents!"
Why can't orphans steal bases?
Because they can't find home.
So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.
The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"
The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it has no home button.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? "Going Home."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where the home is.
What do orphans and broken up couples have in common?
They can't see each other anymore.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Both can't see their parents.
How to make an orphan die?
Tell them to yell until their folks come home.
Guy 1: How far are we going?
Guy 2: About as far as somebody's miscarriage.
Why did the orphan water his cereal instead of milk?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
Has anyone else ever been jealous when their laptop dies?
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Their dad didn't come back with the milk.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They both can't see their parents.
Q: Why are orphans bad at baseball?
A: They can’t find home.
I saw an orphan take a selfie... oh man, that was one alone family photo.