Loss jokes
Why are orphans bad at poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is!
How is an orphan like a boomerang?
They always come back!
What’s the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked!
What do you call an orphan's selfie?
A family photo.
Why can't orphans play video games?
Because they can't access the home screen.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they never make it home.
What do you call an orphan living with ghosts?
"Him and his dead family." :(
Depression: Here, your mom just died.
Me: My mom is already dead.
What’s an orphan's favorite game?
Hide and seek.
What happens when an emo kid loses a Kahoot? He gets a 25 kill streak.
Joe's pizzeria and abortion clinic.
Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.
How do you make an orphan's hand bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come back.
Why do orphans love boomerangs?
They come back.
A woman brought her hamster to the vet. The vet takes a look and concludes the hamster died.
The woman doesn't believe it and requests further investigation. So the vet lets in a Labrador. The dog sniffs around the hamster and shortly after he produces a sad whine, shakes his head and leaves the room with his tail low.
The woman, still not convinced, demands more examinations. The vet gets one of his cats. It walks around the hamster and pets it. After some time it shakes her head and runs off quickly.
"Fine, I believe you now," the woman says, "my beloved hamster is dead." "I'm sorry for your loss," the vet replies. "Your bill for this visit will be 1505 dollars," says the vet. "What? 1505 dollars just to tell me my hamster is dead?" The woman says shocked.
The vet replies: "No, 5 dollars to tell your hamster died, 500 dollars for the lab report and 1000 dollars for the CAT scan."
What do you call an orphan when he's taking a photo?
Family photo.
Where did the orphan go after the orphanage blew up everywhere?
My dad died the other day, but I was able to hear his last words: "Son, are you still holding the ladder?"
What's an orphan's favorite website?
It has a homepage.
What do you call an orphan with a selfie?
A family portrait.