My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.
No, they will be wondering what I look like.
My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.
No, they will be wondering what I look like.
Person: What's your perfect date look like?
Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.
You’re looking pretty rough this evening. You look like if sweatpants were a person.
If you look up the word "wheelchair" in a dictionary, you will see a picture of Stephen Hawking.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?
"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"
I said to my girlfriend nothing can ever make you look ugly...
Because you already look ugly.
When I look at you, I wish I could meet you again for the first time... and walk past.
Roberto: Judd, your DNA looks like the infinite symbol.
Judd: Roberto, your DNA looks like a pasta noodle.
A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."
The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"