Local

Local jokes

Hospital

  • So there’s this air purifier in my room, right? It’s really noisy, so I unplugged it to sleep better, and sure enough, I fell asleep faster. So I came to the conclusion: if I unplug noisy machines, people will sleep better.

    It worked really well in my local hospital.

    Orphanage

  • In my locality, there was an orphanage but everybody in the locality was really sexist too, so they had to change the orphanage into a brothel 'cause everybody took the boys away and nobody was taking the girls and the manager didn't want to waste any 14-year-old pussy, did he?

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  • Toaster

  • When you turn 400 those nasty thoughts sometimes peer in, but if you're lucky, you can be cleansed by the machine spirit by simply visiting your local tech priest.

    A picture of a cartoon character with white hair and a sly smile, with the text "Parents: are you still a virgin? The toaster:"
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  • Community talk

  • Pretty crazy to watch the American government collapsing in real time like this.

    I wish the internet existed the way it did in the early 2000s during the Soviet union. I'd love to read message boards describing what people thought 5-10 years before the whole thing broke down.

    And then the aftermath of people picking at the corpse and becoming absurdly wealthy after scooping up those state assets.

    Republicans have … Read more

  • holy crap. my local yom haatzmaut celebration yesterday was fucking crazy. Literally thousands showed up. And a few dozen pro-Palestinian idiots showed up. But they got bamboozled by a bunch of people who were also waving Israeli and American flags. My dad played an Israeli rap song while we were going by. They looked so pissed. Am Yisrael Chai! It feels great to be a jew.