Rape jokes are like your dad's dick. You don't want it but you still get it anyway.
"I'm not sure why my girlfriend's father doesn't like me."
"What was your first impression on him?"
"I told him, she calls me daddy too."
How do emos propose
Would you like to join my family tree
Why don't orphans like to get lost??
Because somebody's going to ask where their parents are.
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
What does Michael Jackson like about 28yr olds? There's 20 of them!
Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.
i like when people say they hate me because we have something in common <3
People are like potatoes.
We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.
I heard an uber from your eyebrows to your hairline is like 40$
Why are women like hurricanes?
They come in nasty and wet then leave with your house and car.
Why do priests like kids in wheelchairs? Because they can’t run.
why do people like dating us emo girls? because of the texture on our thighs
An orphanage got robbed yesterday. Let's just say that's the second worst thing to happen to those orphans. At least they didn't end up like their parents.
A child with cancer: I want to be like you when I grow up. Doctor: Oh your not going to grow up.
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
An American woman married a British man. On their honeymoon, the British husband said, ̈You look like a million pounds! ̈ The wife divorced him.
Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.
What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? -- People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi doooo.
Girls are like blackjack you shoot for 21 but I keep hitting 14
