Last Jokes

Q)what was the last pizza delivery to 9/11? A)2 large planes.

Why don't you see any more fat chinese men? Because the last chinese man was in WW2.

So there are these 3 strings, they walk into a bar. People are giving them looks. The small chap is your typical thin cord. He walks to the barman and asks for a rum and coke. He replies, "Oii, your kind ain't welcomed here so take your drink, mates and fuck off." He goes back to his mates and says, "We'd better get outta here." "Nonsense." replies the mid guy, he's your typical string. Goes to the barman and same story. Finally the last guy, He's your typical rope. He burst out, "Fuck this!". He twits and ties himself whilst messing up his hair. He struts up to the barman and asks for a rum and coke. The barman does so and whilst he prepares the drink he opens with, "Say aren't you a string?" "No, I'm a frayed knot."

What was the last thing going through the minds of the people who jumped out of the buildings during 9/11?

Their ankles.

There are 4 people ona plane while its crashing and there are only 3 parachutes theres opera, Obama a little girl and, Trump opera grabs. Parachute and says, "I'm famous i get one" And Trump grabs one and says, "Well im president of cource i get one" and obama looks at the little girl and says, "Since your the future or our generation take the last one" the little girl hugs obama and says, "Actually we can both have one Trump took my backpack"

The best night of my life was when gave my virginity to wife and her last word was when she called me “Mommy” at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up 😍.

i will remember my classmates last word: ahh my pens ink spilled on my computer

You have Chinged your last Chong.

1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? - A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? - he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words... - “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance... - only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours... - lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life

why is megan a down

because her last name is downy

build a gordon
ramsay insult
@radravioli
this
2nd digit of bday
0-lamb sauce
1- chicken
2- gravy
3-soup
4-lamb chop
5-spinach
6- spaghetti
7- quail
8- risotto
9- egg
is
bday month
1- like dog food scraps
2- RAW RAW RAW RAW
3- half dead
4- like a rubber implant
5- like gandhi's flip flop
6- pinker than the panther
7- practically cremated
8- offensive
9- like a door stop
10- like web cardboard
11- in need of jesus
12- like toxic scum
you
last number of like ;)
0-absolute donkey
1- dirty pig
2- toilet brush
3-walnut
4- disgrace
5- idiot sandwich
6-yankee doodle donkey
7- lazy cow
8- muppet
9- donut

why do pedophiles come in last place for every race... because they are always un the back ( if you know what i mean) :}

What was George's last message to humanity before joining the others?

I CANT BREATHE

MISSING!! MISSING!! ⚠️⚠️

Name-Kylian Fraudbappe Missing: 28/6/2021 vs Switzerland Characteristics: Disappearing in big games+Diving+always ranting "give me penalty" Possible Locations : Penalty Spot,Parc des princes, Paris Last seen- Manuel Akanji’s back pocket

Hey Guys its Gwen and i want to say that im deleting my account regarding a comment made on my last post :(

there was man, who had just moved from a foreign country. he just moved into his apartment, and was watching his favorite TV shows. the first one was "me-me-me, me-me-me, me-me-me-me-me-me-me," the second one was "forks and knives, forks and knives, all i use is forks and knives," and the last one was "BRING IT ON, FAT MAN!!" There had been a murder in the area, and the man was walking in the park when a cop showed up and asked him "sir, have you seen this man?" and held up a photo. the man said "me-me-me, me-me-me, me-me-me-me-me-me-me." the cop said, "sir, what did you use." and the man said "forks and knives, forks and knives, all i use is forks and knives." after that, the cop said, "sir, im going to have to arrest you," and the man said "BRING IT ON, FAT MAN!!" the screen goes black, and all you can here "chk-chk. BANG"

Albert is an homophobic guy, His cousin Franco also an homophobic guy.

Albert's aunt and cousin have visited his parents, but Albert wasn't knowing that because he came late at night, Franco was sleeping in Albert's bed thinking he would not come at home, Albert laid on his bed thinking there's no one on it, and then they started fucking ^_*

No phobia lasts forever 👌😂