"Fuck off for I killed him, bum bum."
President Joe Biden was jogging through some different jogging paths around this great county we live in and was jogging through Alabama and fell off into a swamp filled with killer alligators, and these 3 boys named Willie, Roman, and Little Johnny saw him fall in and jumped in and drug him to safety, and the president was like "Thank you, thank you, thank you SOOO much. I'm gonna give you boys a reward for saving my life," and asks them what their names were and what they wanted. The first boy said, "My name's Willy, and I want to go to Disneyland," and the president said, "No problem, and I'll take you personally." The 2nd boy said, "My name's Roman, and I want an autographed pair of Air Jordan Nikes," and the president said, "No troubles at all," and the 3rd boy says, "My name's Little Johnny, and I want a power wheelchair with an awesome stereo and killer wheels," and the president says, "You don't look handicapped, Little Johnny," and Little Johnny said, "I'm not, but as soon as I tell my parents who I saved, I will be"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
"I’m on a hunt for my wife’s murderer, have been for years."
"Oh my God! Your wife’s been murdered?!"
"No no, you misunderstand. I’m still looking for him."
Why do orphans hate Ted Bundy? Cause he's the most wanted.
The man was Indian. He moved to England because he wanted to learn, so got a job at the store. He learned how to say "register," then he was a business man. He learned how to say "59887," then "restaurant," so he learned how to say "fork and knives." So a man came with a knife. The cop came and asked the man which was the killer who killed him. He said, "Him," and pointed to the Indian man. The cop asked, "What did you use?" He said, "Register." The cop asked for ID. "59887." The cop asked, "Anything on you, forks and knife?" He said, "Me me me."
Serial killers be like: "Blood is red, veins are blue, next one is YOU."
Why did the orphan become a killer?
Because he knew they would not look for him.
What do JFK’s killer and a prostitute have in common?
“They both blow heads.”
Pokemon: What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!
One day I was walking along the street and I found some caution tape... Just sitting there torn up... Beat up, and you could barely unravel it anymore because I would just burst into shreds... It kinda reminded me of what happened to my sister's killer... They still haven’t found him yet... I’m really good at hide and seek!
If you kill a killer, the same amount of killers in the room stays the same.
What does a lawyer defending a killer and a password have in common? They're case sensitive.
Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!
A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.
What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.
What did the racist serial killer say to the cop?
“Wait, you’re getting paid?”
Why did the serial killer cross the road? To get to the victim's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? The serial killer.
Who killed Hitler goes to Heaven.
*looks up*
Oh, never mind.
Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven. Oh, wait... nevermind...
I bought a new camera once. Every shot I took was killer!
I keep looking for my girlfriend's killer, but no one wants to do it.
