Kids jokes

Emo kid

What happened when the emo kid gave the tree a high five? It left him hanging.

Reaction

There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.

Kid

Ugly kid, people keep saying I'm ugly.

Me: They're certainly not wrong.

Memes

Bathroom

What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.

Girlfriend

My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.

No, they will be wondering what I look like.

Language

I was cussing out this kid for stealing, and their mom walked in and said, "Hey, language!" I just said, "English, bitch!"

Orphan

Me: Where's your mom?

Kid: [cries]

Me: [leaving from the adoption center]

Batman

Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.

Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.

Game

What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?

I spy.

Kid

A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree, who hits the ground first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo kid.

Crash

Random Kid: Aye man where was Kobe flying to?

Launch Site: Umm, he might have gone too close to here, sorry if he might have crashed...

Kid

I saw one kid in a game. He went, "I love you, tree!" He was dumb as cant tell, sorry.