Kids jokes

Q. What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid? A. One has a functioning neck.

Do you know about the new movie Disney made just for cancer kids? It's called Finding Kemo.

I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.

What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.

Are you a school? Because I want to shoot a bunch of kids in you.

Kid: What is between mom's legs?

Dad: Paradise.

Kid: What's between your legs?

Dad: The key to paradise.

Kid: Well, you better change the lock, the neighbor has the key to.

Some kids at school made fun of me for playing Halo. I gave them a halo.

When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it's a piñata... BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!

The quiet kid starts playing "Pumped Up Kicks" in the parking lot before school.

When an emo kid jumps out of a tree, what happens when he hits the ground?

Nothin' much, he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope.

What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?

They both leave the little kids' room with empty sacks.

1 like = 1 kid in my oven. I'm trying to get followers and comments, please.

What did the mentally retarded kid get on his test?

Drool.

What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap? "Just beat it, just beat it."

What do you call a kid with cancer walking through the airport?

•Terminal

What has 50 legs but can't walk?

25 disabled children.

So, I was raping this girl the other night, and she said, "Please just think of my kids!" I was like, "What a freak."

what do you get when you play a country song backwards? you get your wife, your house, and your kids back.

When the school shooter leaves your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up.

When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."

A white dad, a priest, and a rabbi all run out a burning school, and the dad says, “What about the kids?” and the rabbi replies to him saying, “Fuck the kids,” and the priest says, “Think we got enough time?”