Kids jokes

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Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."

What do blind kids and orphans have in common?

Neither of them can see their parents.

My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.

Why don’t I shut myself all the time?

I can only fit so many pairs of kids in my mouth and stomach at the same time.

A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree. Which one is gonna land first?

The leaf, because the rope stops the emo kid.

It's funny how teachers are supposed to educate new lives, but only teach certain kids how much they want to commit suicide and how many ways there are.

There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”

What falls to the ground first if an apple and an emo kid fall from a tree?

The apple because the rope caught the emo kid.

What happens when a depressed kid tries to give a tree a high five?

The tree leaves him hanging :)

Why don't catholic kids lose their virginity in their 20's?

Because they lost it to a priest when they were 5