Kid

Kid jokes

How do pedophiles get kids to suck their d**k?

They spray paint it like candy 🍬.

Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?

Teacher. What?

Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.

Teacher. Why water?

Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.

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    • Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?

    Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.

    Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.

    Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.

    Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.

    Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?

    Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?

    For all those Simpsons fans out there, this one I'm sure you know:

    Abe: "It's rotten being old. No one listens to you."

    Lisa: "It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you."

    Homer: "I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me--no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

    White 40 year olds love little white kids, and so does Trump! The biggest hands to touch the kids and his daughter!

    Teacher: Anyone missing?

    Orphan: My parents.

    Teacher: Something that is real, kid.

    Orphan: My family.

    Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!

    I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

    What do emo kids and Hitler have in common?

    There's gonna be more brains on the wall when they lose something.

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    • Kid: Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?

    Kid 2: Why?

    Kid: 'Cause it's as short as your dick.

    I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut, g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g”.

    Disney just released a new film about a poor kid with cancer. It’s called Finding Chemo.

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