Why did one emo say to the other?
"I like your cuts, G."
Joke Jokes
What day is international terrorist day?
September 11th, 2001.
What do you call an emo committing suicide while filming it?
America’s Funniest Home Videos.
(lol)
A kid went and got a haircut. The day after, he went to school, and a friend says, "I like your cut." He replies, "Which one?"
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make them clap until their parents come back.
A bus full of nuns falls off a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them, “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all through the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question.”
St. Peter turns to the first nun in the line and asks her, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister responds, “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says, “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.
St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.
Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun, “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds, “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”
Me: Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Me: Not your family.
You say to your slow friend: "Damn, you're slower than Stephen Hawking!" And that takes some talent.
Innit.
AB💿
People shouldn't worry about how orphans would feel reading these jokes. It's not like they have parents to buy them a phone or computer to see them, or even a place to charge them even if they did have one.
One day, a priest loses his cock (chicken). He goes to the church and says, "Who has seen a cock?" All the women raised their hands. "No, who has seen a cock that is not theirs?" Half the women's hands went up. "No, no, no, who has seen my cock?" All the nuns' hands went up.
What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.
If someone told me to bring up 9/11, they were trying to make a funny joke, but it didn't work.
That one really *crashed and burned*.
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!
Did you know that..
Studies show 9 in 10 Americans do not have basic math skills.
Oh, thank god I'm in that 1%.
You're so skinny, you could travel through a fax!
Why can’t orphans tell these jokes?
Because they're fun for the whole family to hear.
This is a short joke! This short joke is long. Nice joke, Mr. Steve.
TELL ME YOU'VE DONE THIS WITHOUT TELLING ME YOU'VE DONE THIS.!!! So, we all know when y'all were in school, y'all would fart, but y'all would try to make it silent, but for me, that one day I farted loud, and everyone could hear. Everyone got to blame the annoying kid.
