What’s the best form of contraception?
Being a soccer fan.
Joke Jokes
Why do orphans dip their Oreos in water?
Because dad never came back with the milk.
Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.
What’s the difference between an orphan and cotton? One gets picked.
Why did the son go to the store?
To find his dad.
What did the guy tired of hearing people joke about rape do?
He killed everyone on this f#cking website.
(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?
(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.
(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!
(Kid) Quit what?
(Bus Driver) Living.
(Kid) But it was a joke!
(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.
(Kid) Ok.
(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!
Q. What's a disabled person's favorite band?
A. System of a Down's syndrome.
Bro, I'm so gay I can't even spell straight.
What's the difference between Autism and Gender?
Autism is on a spectrum.
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin.
Whenever I have diarrhea, my roommate gets constipated.
When I told him this, he said, "Are you kidding me?"
I said, "I shit you not."
What is the difference between anal sex and a microwave? A microwave doesn't brown your meat.
What does a perverted frog say?
"Rubbit."
A guy runs into a bar and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
A fat man meets a skinny man.
The fat man tells the skinny man: "When people look at you, they think the world's starving to death."
And the skinny man responds: "When they look at you, they know why."
God loved you so much that He gave you one face and started clearing off a place for another.
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
If I'm holding a cricket ball in each hand, what do I have?
A really fucking huge cricket.
