Knock knock.
Who's there?
Robin.
Robin who?
Robin you, that is who.
Joke Jokes
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Apaches.
Apaches who?
Apaches on your eye.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Por que.
Por que who?
"That's all, folks," in the words of Por que Pig.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abajo.
Abajo who?
I have abajo of water with me.
What does a cat say when it's angry?
- Stop stressing meowt!
OMG, I had a really good hand joke, but I just couldn't put my finger on it.
Two hunters were walking through the forest one day. All of the sudden, one of them passes out. The other hunter panics and dials 911. The emergency responder says, “911, what's your emergency?” The hunter replies, “My friend just passed out and I don’t know what to do! I think he might be dead!” The emergency responder replies, “Before you do anything, make sure he is dead.” The phone goes silent, and then the responder hears a gunshot. The hunter gets back on the phone and says, “Ok, now what?”
If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?
(Stupid People)
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
The morbid jokes on this site.
What's the fastest way to Shepherd's Bush?
Up Shepherd's leg.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
Animal jokes, eh?
Toucan play at that game.
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was "Raraaaughhaugh."
The other day I lost all my crayons.
I just wish I had a shoulder to cray on.
What has 6 legs, 10 arms, and 3 heads?
The Boston marathon finish line.
What do you tell a dead metal fan?
Rust in peace.
Dark humor is like a boy with cancer.
They never get old.
What do you call a downy under water?
Dead fish
How many feminists do you need to change a light bulb?
One. She puts the bulb up and waits for the world to revolve around her.
...just kidding-
- none. They can't change anything.