I have a really good construction joke, but I’ll have to post it later because I’m still working on it.
Why didnt the sun get a job,,,, seriously I have no idea why help me
What do you call an Indian babysitter?
Nanny.
I got a new job at a trampoline park the other day. If I’m being honest, it’s got its ups and downs.
Jimmy asks a elevator operator what he thinks of his job The operator shrugs and says "It has its ups and downs"
Yo Mama So Ugly When She Entered The Scare Factory She Came Out With a Job Application
A girl comes up to her dad and says can I borrow the car tonite I want to go this party dad says if u give a head job girl says your r my dad how can u say that dad says if u want the car girl thinks ok she starts dad that taste like shut dad yer your brother wanted the this morning
I got a job at the can factory but it is soda-pressing
at my sample place i handed my wife a fork and i lost my job
I just found out my ex got stabbed today... let's just say I lost my job as a butcher.
A surgeon loses his job as he botched a surgery.
boss: "We have to let you go."
surgeon: "I protest innocence."
boss: "How?"
surgeon: "I thought doing your job and saving people's lives were two different things."
boss: "Get out!"
A skeleton had a job interview but he looked messy
I had to fix his COLLARbone
I think I might apply for a job cleaning mirrors.
It’s a job I can see myself doing.
What job lets you kill the most people
And abortion doctor
There was this guy asked a girl how much are your hand jobs $25k how much are your blowjobs $50k how much do you charge to have sex on the street? REPLY; i would if i had a pussy
what job do you want if you dont want peoples two since
a catholic priest
When I saw a dead body on the ground and my editor was filming, I told him to censor that a-hole. When I saw the completed product, he censored me. Then I killed him.
So you get a new job, and here something about this guy named mike, The next day you go into the office and mike is sitting next to you, with unicorns and Rainbows and stuff, then, a co-worker comes up and says "No one told you mike was gonna be this GGGAAAAYYYYY *clap clap clap clap*".
I hear coal mining is a rock-bottom job.
Business Interview With Depression Inside my brain...
Me: So... You're new? Depression: (I don't know who he is yet) mHMMMmmm! Me: Well what are your skills? Depression: Oh, taking control and leading... You know... Me: What are you trying out for? Depression: Oh, Vice Leader of Negative Thoughts. Me: Well we do need someone over there- for somewhat reason nobody wanted that job... Me: How did you know about us? Depression: Oh- I knew because of Anxiety, you know, we're friends! Me: Interesting... (Still has no idea about Anxiety and it's problemos) Me: Well I think you're signed up! I'll give you the job! Depression: tHaNKS :)
AND THATS HOW MY LIFE GOT DESTROYED :]
