it's jokes
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
What's the difference between a baby and a ball?
If you inflate the ball, it won't explode.
🤔 What do gay men who are physically handicapped ♿ can do better than a man who is heteroflexible when 🤔 he has another man's 😍 😋 😜 😏 😳 😉 cock inside 😋 of his warm mouth 👄 👄 give a 👍 👍 good blowjob?
This pastor decided to skip church one Sunday morning and go play golf.
He told his assistant that he wasn't feeling well. He drove to a golf course in another city, so nobody would know him.
He teed off on the first hole. A huge gust of wind caught his ball, carried it an extra hundred yards and dropped it right in the hole, for a 450 yard hole in one.
An angel looked at God and said "What'd you do that for?" God smiled and said "Who's he going to tell?"
What's a tower's favorite bagel? I don't know, but it ain't plain.
It's getting near midnight, and I can already hear Big Ben. He's upstairs pumping the wife.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Susan. Susan who? Season your chicken, it's too plain!
I went to the zoo but all I saw was a dog.
Yeah, it was a shih tzu!
His boss gave him some projects to work on, but he failed at it.
His boss told him: "You suck."
And he started sucking his boss, after he was done.
His boss told him: "You suck for life!"
XD
Dark humor is like sex. Not everyone gets it.
I was gonna tell you a Kobe Bryant joke.
But it would just crash and burn.
Who is the fastest reader? 9/11, it went through 10 stories in 7 seconds.
Mama is so Catholic, Swiss cheese wishes it was as holy as she is. Do you...
Why didn’t the moon eat dinner?
Because it was full! 🌕
I wonder if the 2 Irish kids off the Titanic movie who went to sleep before it sank had wet dreams?
So a man walks into the bar. The bartender looks to him and says, "You look like you're having a rough day, tell me about it?"
The man then stood up and became Mario!
Can we go back to 2001?
I bet it was more fun back then.
NASA is going to probe Uranus, and it might take a while to get there.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
How did the fat person cross the road?
It rolled.