it's jokes
If you're happy and you know it, f*** your mom.
Why is the U.S. so mad about the Twin Towers? It was an accident. The pilots were new.
Why did the Titanic sink? It's because they didn't want the icebergs' candy.
Why do orphans commit crimes?
It’s the only time they’re ever wanted.
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
What does my dad and the Twin Towers have in common? They used to be with us, now it's just a sensitive topic.
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
Why does Saturn have a ring?
Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture frame?
It only took one nail to hang the picture frame.
Why can't orphans work at SC Johnson?
Because it's a family company.
*P.O.V orphan wanting to go on school trip/camp*
Teacher: “Can I have your parent's signature? It isn’t filled out.”
Orphan: “Um yeah.... That’s gonna be hard....”
Teacher: “Why?”
Orphan: “I just have to find them first....”
Why can orphans watch PG movies?
Because it's "Parental Guidance."
Me: I'm retarded.
Teacher: Why?
Me: It took me 2 hours to see "60 Minutes."
Why is a brick always hard? Because the Indians played with it enough.
When you think you're depressed, but you know you're probably just using depression to be lazy and self-loathing, but then you realize that it, in itself, might actually be a symptom of depression.
Well gang, it looks like we've got another mystery on our hands!
Why can't orphans work at SC Johnson?...
Because it's a FAMILY company.
My dad said people shouldn’t get ribbons just for participating because it rewards them for losing.
So I took down his confederate flag.
Q: How did the skeleton know it would rain? A: He read the weather forecast.
What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.