IT jokes
Is Google a girl or a boy?
Obviously a girl, because it won't let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion.
"Tibia" honestly, I think the reason I’m "bonely" is because you guys don’t find my jokes "humerus."
Maybe if I played the trombone it would get people’s attention, but "tibia" honest I can’t be bothered, so just look at my "BONE-zai" tree, although my brother doesn’t really like that one, so how about a "S-pine" tree?
While writing my suicide note, I got a paper cut... it’s a start.
Why did people bully the burning circuit?
It was too short.
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
What's the difference between a man's wife and his dog?
Lock them both in the trunk for three hours and see which is happy to see you when you open it.
It's ice to see you.
A man once went to a doctor because his leg was turning blue.
The doctor said that his leg had to be amputated as it was getting poisonous.
The man then got plastic prosthetics.
Next day even the prosthetics started turning blue.
After much examination, the doctor found that the patient's pants were shedding color.
Why are mountains 🏔 so funny? Because they’re hill areas, do you get it? They are hill areas, like a mountain is a hill area. It sounds like hilarious, so you get it.
Boy: Crap, I hit a deer.
Girl: Awe... I guess it’s not so much of a dear.
Boy: ...
Boy: Get the hell out!
What’s the difference between being a genius and being an idiot?
Being a genius has its limits.
What do you think of your mom? I can do it.
Why don’t eagles 🦅 like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it!
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
It's amazing how dog owners can make their dogs shout different things. For example, Czech dogs go "barf," American dogs go "woof," and Chinese dogs go "sizzle."
Why can’t an orphan have a dog? It always runs away.
Hi, I did not get it when I went home to walk home from home and walk, walk, walk.
Brojobs are like air. It's not important until you don't have any.
What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.
What kind of dogs do miners like best?
Golden retrievers, haha, get it?