Inheritance jokes

One man's trash is another man's treasure.

Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you were adopted.

Q.) What do you call an orphan's family tree?

A.) A family stump.

A grandfather is on his rocking chair. His grandson comes to him and asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds with a "no". His granddaughter then comes along and asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds, "Why do you keep asking me to croak?" The granddaughter replies, "Because Dad says if you do, we get to go to Disneyland."

What's My Favorite Thing About My Grandpa?

His life insurance...

I have no father. Like if you relate.

What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?

"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."

My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."

Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."

How did the Java programmer's son get rich?

Because of inheritance.

I will always remember my grandpa's last words. "Shit, the ladder is falling!"

What do you call a person that inherits a lot of money?

A millionheir.

Why can't orphans be gay?

They have no one to call daddy.

Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.

What do you call an orphan's family tree? A stump.

Why can't orphans work at S.C. Johnson? Cause it's a family company.