Illegal Substance Jokes

Drug Dealer

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I have been tripping all day!

Drug

What's the difference between kids and drugs? I don't sell drugs.

Money

How can a prostitute make more money than a drug dealer?

She can clean her crack and sell it again.

Difference

What is the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?

A prostitute can wash their crack and resell it.

Drug

What's the difference between drugs and children? I don't sell drugs.

Quack

What did the duck say to the drug dealer?

Gimme some of that quack!

Hooker

What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?

A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Drug

Man: *steals drink*

Boy: bro😭😭

Man: Why are u crying over a drink?

Boy: That had drugs.

Man: ....

Drug

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.

I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

Drug

So I got these new shoes, except they were from a drug dealer.

Now I don't know what they were laced with, but I was trippin' all day.

Drug

I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I know he LCD'd them and all, but I have been tripping all day.

Gram

Teacher: How much is a gram?

Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need.

Coke

I snorted a line of coke off my 8-year-old sister’s tiny prepubescent vag. She just laid there and let me do it without complaining, probably because she was already dead.

Yo mama

Yo mama so fat, she was pulled over... FOR HAVING 12 POUNDS OF CRACK ON HER!