Identity jokes
Like if you know someone is emo and comment "emo🇷🇺."
What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.
If you are what you eat,
why is Jeffrey Dahmer white?
Q. What's the best part of living in Alabama?
A. Not having to change your last name when you get married.
What do you call it when orphans take a family photo? A selfie!
Bro: I’m not that autistic. bro
A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.
He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is one.
Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*
Me: Uh, male?..
Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*
Me: You silly goose.
*Silence for like three seconds*
Me: Still male though-
Why did my dad leave me?
Because I was gay.
Me. I am the worst joke ever.
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There used to be two until they divided into multiple pieces.
Wife: I’m pregnant.
Husband: Hi pregnant, I’m dad.
Wife: No, you’re not.
"Hi, I’m Dan White’s dad. Where is he?"
Comment on this if you are somewhat like me: depressed, single, gay, and act like you're not burning inside.
I am cool.
Two mates walk into a bar.
Mate 1: "Shit! Look at that spider over there!"
Mate 2: "Whateverrrrrrr."
Mate 1: "No, seriously, it's bloody massive!"
Mate 2: "(Turns around) Shit, that's huge, I thought you were joking."
Mate 1: "No, I'm Fred King, Jo King's brother ;-)"
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call daddy.
What did Grant say? "I'm gay."
What do you call an orphan with no relatives?
An orphan with no relatives.
I'm worth something, I got a barcode on my arm!