New Identity Jokes - Page 23 - Worst Jokes Ever

Jack and Jill went up the Jill so Jack could lick Jill's fanny, but Jack had a shock with a mouthful of cock because was actually a tranny.

So a man asked another man what’s your name and he says what’s it to ya. So the guy asked agoim and he says what’s it to ya. Come to find out his name was what’s it to ya

My friend David lost his ID.

Now he is just Dav.

Three nuns died in a car crash. They went up to heaven at the pearly gates. The gatekeeper said, "This really should not have happened, so I am going to send you back to earth as different people. Tell me who you want to be or look like." The first nun said, "I want to look like Madonna." Puff, you look like her now, but you can’t use her name. And sent her down to earth. The second one said, "I want to look like Marilyn Monroe." He then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun said, "I want to look like Sarah Pipalini." The gatekeeper says to her, "Sarah Pipalini, who is that?" She gives the gatekeeper a newspaper article. He reads it, shakes his head no, and says, "It’s not Sarah Pipalini, it's Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men."

Yes, I'm CUTE.

C-ringe U-gly T-errible E-mpty.

what do you call a lazy gay?

someone who comes straight out of the closet, and goes straight to the couch.

An American and an Asian walk into a bar. What are your names? the bartender asks. The American says, "William Matthews." The Asian says, "Same Ting."

"Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" "It's Dave!"

"Dave who?"

Dave bursts into tears, realizing that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

One man's trash is another man's treasure.

Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you were adopted.

What do you call a Native American with a boner?

A redwood.

Kate: Can we have a threesome?

Trevor: Sure.

The lights go off and Trevor starts doing what he's supposed to be doing, and then he feels something going up his back end. He goes to punch the person behind him, but then he turns on the light, and it was Kate behind him, and he's been fucking the guy the whole time.

Guy 2 whispering: Oh, I got tired of acting gay.

Guy 1: I heard you. Why are you acting gay?

Guy 2: To attract gays and then give them advice.

Guy 1: So what's your advice to me?

Guy 2: That I just know you're gay.

LOL xD

So, is a homosexual in a coma a fruit or a vegetable?

My name is Gunter.

Me: Are you an orphan?

Boy: Yeah, what gave me away?

Me: ....ur parents.

I see some objects over there... oh, never mind, that's a woman.

I saw two men wearing the same clothing and walking together, so I asked both of them if they were gay. They did not hesitate arresting me after I said that.