Howe jokes
"Poor old fool," thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink.
The gentleman asked, "So how many have you caught today?"
The old man replied, "You're the eighth."
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck?
If a woodchuck could chuck wood?
As much wood as a woodchuck could chuck,
If a woodchuck could chuck wood.
How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.
How do you anger a white Christian nationalist?
Tell him the truth.
Memes
How did the fat person cross the road?
It rolled.
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
Q: How do emo kids complement each other?
A: I like your cuts g.
How much alcohol does JFK prefer to drink?
3 shots.
How to get into politics?
Fail art school.
How do I fix a broken light bulb? I don't. I simply blow up the house.
How does Hellen Keller meet men?
She goes on blind dates.
How do you know a woman is blind?
Because she can’t see the kitchen or the laundry.
How do you piss off a midget?
Give them a yo-yo and tell them to play with it.
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
You know how people say white men can’t jump? Well, you should check the 9/11 footage.
Did you hear about the woman who broke up with the man who had a small penis?
When his friends ask how he’s doing, he said, “I wasn’t that into her.”
What record did Obama prove during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he'll still be in government housing.
This is how big cats were named.
"I HATE BIG CATS. THAT ONE IS A LIAR, THAT ONE IS A CHEATER. THE ONE IS A POO-MA."
"Lion. Cheetah. Puma. You're getting a promotion."
How many push-ups can Chuck Norris do?
All of them.