Howe jokes

Car

What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?

"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"

Van

How many times can 46 go into 8? Just hop in the van and find out.

Story

A man is telling his story to someone. "My friends always said that they would kill me if I wore Gucci or Supreme. On April 1st, I wore both and conversed with them."

"Interesting."

"That's the story of how I got to the morgue," he says to The Gatekeeper of Heaven.

Parrot

[God creating the parrot] OK, HOW ABOUT A TYE-DYE CHICKEN THAT SCREAMS ACTUAL WORDS AT YOU?

Memes

Cookie

How do you make Alabama cookies?

Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.

Cat

Question: How did the cat cross the river?

Answer: It didn’t, it drowned.

Baby

Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.

Difference

You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?

Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.

Traffic

All the traffic stopping the cars, how do you spell that without any R’s?

That.

Fish

If there are 12 fish and 6 drown, how many are left?

12, because fish don't drown.

Mom

Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young to be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.

Woman

A hot woman called "Jessie" was showering when the phone rang.

Jessie was upset because the phone wouldn't stop ringing, and she goes out naked from the bathroom to answer the phone in the hall.

Jessie on the phone: 《Hello? 》

The one on the phone: 《Oh hi, I'm Jeff, I just wanted to tell you don't go out from your bathroom naked next time because my brother is behind you right now trying to rape you.》

Jessie: 《Stop it my sister! This is the 10th time you do this cringe joke! It gets boring!》

But sadly it wasn't a joke, and she cried a lot that night and learned how not to go out naked from the bathroom again.

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