what's the difference between me and an old man no one pulled my life support
A guy goes in to get some tests done, the doctor comes out and says "I got good news and bad news." The guy says "Ok, let's get the bad news out of the way." The doctor says "The tests cam back positive, you got 2 weeks to live." The guy says, "Oh My God!! Then what the hell is the good news?" Doctor says "You see that nurse over there, the one with the big tits? I'm screwin her."
When Stephen Hawkings died did they take him to the Hospital or PC World?
imagine this senario: a doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses in the world like this: "you have depression, diarrhea, cancer,... etc" and then the last one on the list is that he is deaf.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital .........because she was crummy what did the toilet say to the other toilet .........you look flushed what has 1 head 1 foot and 4 legs ...........a bed
As a doctor myself, there nurse was very slow, she tested my patience!
Patient: where are you taking me, doctor? Doctor: the morgue Patient: hang on! I'm not dead yet! Doctor: and we're not there yet!
"A priest, an imam, and a rabbit walk into a clinic to donate blood. The rabbit turns to the nurse and says, 'I think I'm a Type-O.'"
Ok so one time a deaf kid got in to a car accident but he didnt herd in on the new
i work on medicine my jod is to smell it to see if its bad :)
what do you call a doctor that's a skeleton? doctor bones
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
I was walking down the streets with my parents and my sister, my mum said "step on a crack break your mother's back" I stepped on a crack, my sister has been in the hospital ever since
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards? DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!
So there’s this air purifier in my room right, and it’s really noisy so I unplugged it to sleep better and sure enough I fell asleep faster, so I came to the conclusion if I unplug noisy machines people will sleep better. It worked really well in my local hospital
Let me just remove my finger from your bottom. Thank you nurse.
Donald Trump is making hospitals so poor that they are using kidney beans for their transplants
Yo so small that wen you go the doctor he doesn’t no you there
I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital Just to test their patients