HI jokes

I can't believe what just happened. I was at the bowling alley having a great time with my girlfriend when suddenly a man took all of our bowling pins! I asked him why and he said he needed more tapins to keep his career relevant. I instantly realized it was Penaldo!

You say Alex Jones, I say Alex moans mmmmm. I like that fat, tasty big boy and his Rolex watches, mummy, he turns me on!

What is the difference between a detective company and a man with eyes on his butt?

One has a private eye, and the other has eyed privates.

This kid was crying, so I asked him where his parents were. He just cried harder. I still remember him every time I pass that orphanage.

I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"

My grandpa was the best soldier ever. He gunned down over 100 soldiers in his bunker during D-Day.

Why did the orphan cry? Because he was an orphan and he watched his parents die.

What does the drummer call his twins? Anna 1, Anna 2.

Ahaha, I'm laughing because my friend is so black his mama killed the clown.

I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder.

The ungrateful brat. I see why he is an orphan.

Wilt Chamberlain may have spread his seed among many women, but Kobe spread his brain matter all over California.

My dad said he'd get the milk, but he forgot I was in his car.

Why couldn't the surfer hang 10?

Because he forgot his feats!

Hi how are you?

"Hi, I’m Dan White’s dad. Where is he?"

Why do orphans hate Cocomelon?

Because his mom and dad are in every episode!

Why does Aaron eat burgers on a Wednesday? Because his spine is bent, and his favorite gun in Apex Legends is the G7 Scout, and he uses the speedy Spanish man.

Why does Aaron like men? Because his dad beats him.

A farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm and says, "This is the pig I'm fucking." She says, "You idiot, that's a sheep!" He says, "Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."